The Storm Within the Calm

As with anything, a job search has its peaks and valleys. Sometimes things will be so hectic that you will have 3 interviews in one week. Other times, it will get so slow, you wonder why they posted the job in the first place if there’s no urgency to fill it! The valleys, or the crevices, are the hardest – you have to sit idly by while someone else decides your future – to shortlist or not to shortlist; to interview or not to interview. This is what is called Paranoid Panic Mode or PPM for short (it’s not really a thing, I just made it up.) This is when you send out resumes and a few weeks go by without you hearing a thing. Not just the usual radio silence, but the kind of silence that makes you think your e-mail is not working properly, or your computer is broken; when you check your phone to make sure you are still able to receive calls; or double-check your voicemail to ensure it’s not the problem. I find this the most difficult aspect of the job hunt process because nothing is in your hands. You’ve reached out to your contacts to put in a good word for you for that perfect job; you’ve done your research, you’ve sent out your cover letter and resume as per the instructions on the posting; you’ve reached out to the recruiter on LinkedIn and now you wait. You wait while your insides slowly melt away from the fake ulcer this whole process has created and take another Tums while trying to come up with a new strategy. You wait while you figure out what you can do to fill the empty hours of your day besides watching TV, reading, writing, cooking (or attempting to!), cleaning, going to the mall, watching movies, etc. These are all valid parts of life; a reality of sorts, but somehow, it doesn’t fulfill you. Not to your very core. it’s not what you were made for. It’s not your purpose in life. So you wait. And pray that the storm will pass.

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